Amusing and Original Sayings by Children 1905

A loving mother, in a cosy home, had been putting her little daughter to bed whilst a heavy thunderstorm raged without. When the child was in bed the mother kissed her and said: “Now darling, I must leave you, and go down beside daddy; you need not be afraid, because God is beside you, you know.” The child seemed satisfied, and the mother went downstairs. Presently a white-robed figure appeared in the doorway of the room where husband and wife were seated, and a little voice said: “Mother, I think I’ll come and stay with daddy, while you go beside God.”

I had taken my little daughter to the Theatre, and she very speedily became interested in a bald old gentleman in our immediate vicinity. “Pop,” she inquired, “Why has that man cut off all his hair? The other men haven’t cut off theirs!” “Don’t ask such questions,” I remarked, “it is very rude. Be quiet, there’s a dear.” She obeyed my behest for a time, and then with an air of triumph she declared: “I know now. He has cut off his hair and put it on his chin.”

The governess was reading to the children the story of Naboth’s vineyard, and had got as far as when the King, “turned his face to the wall and would eat no bread.” “Should fink he wanted some cake!” remarked Bobbie, thoughtfully.

Aunt, by no means a Venus, severely to little girl: “Now look pleasant, and don’t make such ugly faces, otherwise you will grow up quite plain.” “Did you, Aunt, make ugly faces when you were a girl?”

On a certain Sunday morning the Vicar preached about St. Stephen, and in the course of his sermon used the word “martyr” two or three times. Afterwards at the midday meal, one of his children said in a most innocent way: “Father, was Stephen really a tomato?

Source: Isle of Wight Observer 18 March 1905

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